Oh the irony of it all.  According to my daughter, if my, shall we say, observers, use the slip up of mine (i.e. "why are you trying to kill me?")  then she says the whole family will believe me about being 'observed' and harrassed by these people,  however if they don't use it - on the one hand I am spared public embarrassment - but on the other they can continue what they're doing.  It must be a tough choice for them, the urge to use it must be tremendous.  However the fun of watching me flounder around and having my family think I'm just a little bit nuts is probably too good to stop.If they use it, questions would be asked about why they just happened to be recording me at that time of morning.  i.e. How did they know I would even go up to them, and even if they thought I might, why did they record it? Of course they will say that I harrass them, and they will pull up clips of times when I have reacted to their baiting, times when I have been tired and just responded, when I should have kept ignoring them as usual.   When I would go outside and get called 'an old cow' I would usually just keep quiet, but one time I was fed up with that woman, who I had never called anything, saying such nasty things, so I said "I may be an old cow, but at least I wear underwear, you slut".
She said to her husband, "did you hear that?" as if what she had said was ok, but my reaction was not.  He said, (probably knowing the underwear thing is true), don't carry it on".  Wise move.  So when you get that sort of thing on tape, and edit out the before bit, and just show the reaction, you get someone who looks nasty, unprovoked.

So my hearing the neighbours and co. is considered my being paranoid schizophrenic.  I may or may not be.  I think it's a wonder that I am not totally insane with what they've done over the years.  Unfortunately my husband thinks I am and so do the rest of my family.  You'd think this would indicate that I was, however the 'voices' I hear are not in my head, they are in the neighbours carport or backyard.  I don't hear any voices when I'm out and about,  I hear THEIR voices when I am home alone.

My husband is angry at me for stopping therapy on my own accord, but it's really difficult to let someone pass judgement on me - paranoid schizophrenic - knowing that's what I sound like - but that it's not true.  He says "It's all too perfect." and I agree.  As long as I'm the only one they target, and as long as they do it when I'm alone, it's perfect.  So I have to wear that label.  I've had to pretend that's what I am so that the peace is kept, because no matter how many times in the past (I gave up a while ago) that I told him they said this or that when i was hanging out washing or at the letterbox, he didn't believe me.  He says that I have always been paranoid.  And that is also true, but in my defence, it has never been of everyone, just certain people, and I am often proven right in the long run about my suspicions of that particular individual. And having some paranoia is different to hearing 'voices' and suspecting everyone of a consipracy.  So I'll keep their comments to myself, I'll go to therapy - again.  They must love the fact that my husband thinks their games are all in my head.